


Changes

by Lunlun



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Character Study, M/M, Melancholy, Memories, lost chances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:27:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28293090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunlun/pseuds/Lunlun
Summary: After seventy years of being in the great link Odo returns to Deep Space Nine, contemplating about his past and his friends.
Relationships: Odo/Quark (Star Trek)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	Changes

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't a fic where Quark and Odo find back together, it's about the chances one misses because of emotional immaturity, maybe even because one doesn't always notice how important certain things were.  
> But it's also a story about responsibility.
> 
> So basically an Odo character story, camouflaged as a Quodo story  
> enjoy

It takes him some time to break away from the ones holding him back. It’s less a holding back then it is a forcing him back, keeping him where he is, one entity with many, an individual in a sea of sameness. It’s been bliss and it’s been everything he wished for. Changing his fellow brethren so that their race may become something less vicious and vile. A race that respected others and learned to love them. It was a hard process and in the midst of his work he realized at some point that the sea was overtaking him. That the individuality he’s built up in Deep Space Nine was slowly but surely disappearing and with it memories that were precious to him, memories that made him who and what he was. Memories with which he was teaching the link.

And the link greedily took what he taught, greedily swallowed his memories and experiences, questioned his motives and ostracized him, until one day many years back it suddenly accepted – partly – as a drop slowly swimming through the sea and eventually changing its very core. A drop, an idea that found foot and rippled until it became more, a storm, a rain of drops that forced change.

Odo watches out of the window. He only knows how many years it has been that he left Deep Space Nine because the ship has a date on one of the panels.

His brethren still do not understand his reluctance to give himself to true timelessness, do not yet understand that time changes many things, that not dying an old age did not mean that their environment didn’t change every fifty years completely. In even less time.

Odo remembers the wars he’s seen, the occupations he’s witnessed, the oppression, the aggression, the hopelessness.

But he also remembers the new worlds he’s visited, the new people he’s met, the unity, the love and the hope he’s seen.

And his life as a solid hadn’t been long, a measly 26 years. An infant in his people’s eyes. An adult in the eyes of solids. A fetus in the eyes of the universe.

Odo places his hand on the window, watches the many stars, so big yet so far away that they look like Terran fireflies. They pass them on their journey to the Alpha Quadrant, destination Deep Space Nine.

Odo asks himself, how much may have changed since he’s left everyone and everything behind. How many of his friends he would meet again, how much he would yet again witness.

His skin ripples. He looks at his hand and arm, his regeneration cycle has shortened since he became accustomed to not be solid. To not force himself to stay in form. The next moment he finds himself as a puddle on the ground. Just being the way he was meant to be.

* * *

The first step onto Deep Space Nine feels like coming home, the next one is filled with anxiety and the many that follow thereafter are a curious mixture of what he will see next. Where his friends are. He knows that Kira must have grown old, too old to work, that Sisko might be dead as much as it saddens him, he knows that Jake must be old, that Nog likely wasn’t around but on a Starfleet vessel and he wonders if Quark’s bar is still around.

His steps lead him through the habitat ring first, it’s the only thing still remotely familiar, the ring seems to have changed little. The Cardassian architecture still as gloomy as it was all those years back. People pass him, many new faces he has never seen, not even in the passing, different species, some of which never seen on Deep Space Nine. And then finally, after a deep breath – something that soothes him in his shifted solid body – he takes his first step onto the promenade. Passes the security office, inside sitting is a security officer Odo does not recognize, but he does not stop there. His destination is the bar. Quark’s bar to be specific. Because it’s been Quark that always accepted him as a lone individual, was when time was right a nemesis and on others an ally, by his side yet never dictating how he was supposed to be or accepted as someone.

The bar is still where it was over seventy years ago. It’s as full with different characters as it has been then too. Odo steps closer, steps through the doors, inside there’s a Ferengi bartender. But he isn’t Quark. Odo finds himself in front of the counter, watches the bartender for some time, watches some of the Dabo girls, the patrons. But after having analyzed a while the Bartender talks to him.

“Can I help?”

Odo startles around, opens his mouth to use words he hasn’t used in long. “Yes. Where’s the owner of this establishment?”

“That would be me.”

The Ferengi grins from ear to ear.

“That can’t be.” Odo responds, ashamed for the fraction of a second for his sudden reaction. “I apologize. In the past there was another owner with the name Quark.”

The Ferengi’s eyes widen, then a devious grin finds its way right onto his face. “Sure.” He goes around the counter after pushing the glass in his hand into the hands of another worker. “He was.” He waggles his browridges. “An old colleague of his?”

“You could say that.” Odo straightens in his seat. “Where is he?”

“He’s the big boss.” The owner of the bar shrugs. “This bar is mine, but technically I work for him.” Then he licks his lips, leans closer to Odo with his ugly demeanor. “Maybe you could put in a good word with the boss for me, you know for the information.”

Odo regards him for a moment. “No.” Then stands up to leave.

He hears some angry mumbling behind him from the Ferengi, something about never giving away valuable information without proper bribes. Ferengi’s never changed but as it seemed in the last seventy years their way of dealing with strangers evolved, more trusting – this one at least.

Odo leaves the establishment. Only stops walking when he can watch it from a safe distance, when the memories of the bar do not contradict with what is inside.

Odo wonders for a moment what could’ve happened if he stayed. His memories greedily taken by the link had faded yet the ones with Quark were as vivid as they had been ages ago. Odo wonders what could’ve become of them if he hadn’t left without a goodbye, didn’t disregard him like he’s always done.

Maybe they could’ve become actual friends maybe more. Yet who was Odo tricking but himself. He was alone with his thoughts, none of those he trusted were left on Deep Space Nine. Not even the one person he could be sure would always be here. Quark.

He too had moved on, had become part of something bigger, worked to achieve some of his dreams.

Left where he was, Odo wondered about the possibilities and made his way down the promenade on his hunt to see what happened to everybody else, so that their fate became something more concrete he could grasp and understand.

And who knows maybe, if his hunt for information was complete, after he had closure with those that shaped his individuality he could either return to the link or go after the only viable possibility who’s memories even now wouldn’t leave his mind.

He was for the first time truly alone on Deep Space Nine.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment,  
> Comments add to my life,  
> Help me become an Immortal


End file.
